University Thoughts & November Goals ❀

Good morning lovely! Over the past few months I've been having many thoughts about my life, things I'm uncertain about and the direction that I'm heading in. I know everyone goes through these moments at different stages and recently this has been me. It isn't the first time and will very likely not be the last, but as of right now there are some things that have been taking up a lot of space in my mind. Like my current uni course. I posted at the beginning of the year that I had got into my first preference at uni and that it was a Bachelor of Interior Design. I thought this would be the perfect course for me, I've always been interested in designing homes and commercial spaces. Even as a child I would be sitting and drawing up floor plans, maybe not to scale but that doesn't matter.


Growing up I had so many different aspirations, the main one was acting. Being an actress was always the number one career in my mind. Though I seemed to always have two things I wanted to do, acting and something else that kept changing. There was a time where I wanted to be a hairdresser, a journalist, an architect, an author, filmmaker, office lady (my very young childhood goal hahaha), flight attendant, and the list goes on. Something that I really felt like would be a great career for me was a clinical psychologist. This was something I became very interested in from early high school. At the end of grade 12 I was tossing up between working towards being a psychologist and an interior designer. But because of the never-ending headache I was also considering not doing university at all. I ended up going with interior design and for a long time I was very happy with my decision. 

Like I said earlier, I have been having second thoughts on my life in general and what I want to do. I have lost my passion for interior design and have not enjoyed studying it. There has only been one unit that I very much enjoy and that is Interior Tech. This is the unit where we learn to how to draft technical drawings and they need to be exactly precise. It is the most technical unit but also the most relevant. To those who think a career in interior design is picking pillows and curtains, that is not all all the case. If the course was more like this unit  think I would enjoy it more. But the other units have been far to 'fluffy' for me, so conceptual to the point where you are not marked on your work, but you as a person. It's conceptual in the sense that it doesn't matter how you justify it, they can argue it however they wish because there is no set criteria if that makes any sense. The tutors are inconsistent in their feedback and it is quite frustrating. When I first started having second thoughts I pushed all the negative aspects aside and decided to just push through. But I am honestly not sure if I even want a career in interior design. I didn't want to drop out because I didn't know what else I wanted to do. With having pain 24/7 it was difficult to decide whether I wanted to continue with uni, even in a different course. I have been feeling very lost in life and stuck in a place where  don't want to be.

After a lot of thinking and consideration, meeting with different people for advice and a few meltdowns, I now have a better idea of what I am going to do. I know that I will not be continuing with my current interior design course. I am finishing this year however so that I have some credit. Over the long break I hope to declutter my mind and figure out what I will do next year. I am applying to do a Bachelor of Justice at the same university, if I pass my current units I can have them auto credited (not entirely sure what this means but that is what I have been told). I may defer a semester, or choose to study part-time. I have long break to think about it all. 

Goals for November

♥ Enjoy working at my new job. 

♥ Continue being active - I find that being active is great for managing anxiety too!

♥ Declutter - I have some serious decluttering to do, which will also help with decluttering my mind.     I'll start with something small, like nail polishes, then I'll do clothes etc. 

♥Read a good book - I haven't read a good book in such a long time and to be honest haven't felt like reading since doing English back in high school. I really lost interest in reading during the last year of high school and it just recently came back! I'm currently reading Dark Places by Gillian Flynn and oh my god it's got me hooked!

♥And of course blog more - I'd love to know if this kind of post is too long or written in a way that's not engaging. Or maybe you like this style? 



4 comments

  1. Ah Sophie I totally get the feelings you're having, I'm definitely one of those people who changes want they want to do career wise on a weekly basis. I hope you sort things out though, I think you just need to trust your instincts. It sounds like you have a good place.

    The Makeup Directory

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    1. Thanks Sally! That has been me all throughout life, especially during high school. Hoping everything will into place (at least somewhat!) xxx

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  2. I love Gillian Flynn, I'd love to read more books too but I just can't find the time. I liked this post plus it seemed to help you get things organised in your mind, which is always a good thing <3

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    1. Thank you Trona! I'm glad you liked my post, it definitely did help organise things in my mind. I'll be reading more of Gillian's books over this Summer so I'm really looking forward to it! xx

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-Sophie ♥